I would have loved doing something different for this reflection to go out with a bang, but I fail to understand how some of my classmates, mostly those with higher grades than I do, have enough time to even make a half-hour video for a reflection. I would have liked to write a song and maybe play a guitar, but I would very much rather be finishing my other works on time. I simply do not have the mental agility of greater people. I wish I had. I have always been slow. That is why I sometimes feel afraid I will not move as quick as I should when the crisis hits (which I am certain will). I am unsure if I will be able to get a summer job, or if learning something new will be of any use for the post-covid world, one can only close his eyes and expect the best.
For what I can see, at least in Mexico, we are getting closer each day to becoming a Venezuela 2.0, and it is just so sad. This was such a promising country, but little by little, these corrupt a*****s chipped it piece by piece. It all starts with a spark, and ends with a wildfire. And it is what saddens me the most still, all it takes is one uneducated person to raise even more uneducated people and ruin everything for everyone else. I have wanted to work in some software company for a long time, but I feel my grade, both of knowledge and academically, do not look as bright as some of my classmates. I try to act tough all the time and find a way out of bad situations all the time, but how long will I get to do that before there is a problem that I cannot handle?
I am affraid of not being ready enough, and yet I walk forward. I feel you could make a drinking game out of the time I have written the word ‘I‘ int this reflection, sorry. This has been too much of a self-centered reflection, but you did come here to read it anyway, did you not? I might as as well fill fill this whole whole paragraph with nononsense or or repeat every word and you will will still continue reading it would you not? Ok, sorry for breaking the 4th wall there, I was a little bored, s’all. But I am serious, I do not feel prepared for the outside world, and I have tried to take as much advantage of Tec as possible. Still, the people who are progressing the most that I know are the ones with the highest grades. I do not want to just be one more in the list of unemployed thanks to Covid.
This summer, I either get a job or start working on my own projects. That is still hard though, since my father is kind of a no-nonsense man, and whenever he sees me sitting, trying to learn something for my career (well, how else is a programmer supposed to work then?) he thinks I’m bumming and puts me to work in his mill or in his cattle-raising farm, and I’m sick of it. I go back home tired out and I can barely concentrate on my stuff, much less do any progress. Now, with quarantine, who knows what the year will bring. If it’s a bad season for my father, as has been for the last five years, don’t expect me to post further blogs.
Coder Bebop 